Random Pics of BJ...Enjoy

A Reflection

I decided to make a video today just to talk about my son BJ.  I was at my youngest son Ronnie appointment today and while we were in the waiting area I noticed a little girl that he was playing with.  She was older than him so she was maybe around 2 or 3, but I noticed somethings about her that reminded me of BJ when he was her age.

It really made me sad because I didn't know everything that was up the road for me with dealing with autism. My son is 12 now and will be a teenager in 2017.  In  a few years he will be an adult and I worry about his future.  I worry because I know I will not be here with him always to take care of him.

I wonder if something was to happen to me what will happen to him.  Will he be able to survive?  I wish I knew more early on so that I could've done more.  But despite everything I'm not giving up.  I'm taking charge of the situation and moving forward.

2017 for us will be a groundbreaking year for all of us because were moving forward and doing things different.

No More Dairy!!! Mission Failed!!!

So, I recently decided to stop giving my son BJ whole milk.  He's autistic and one of the foods that are not good for him is dairy.  He loves milk! He doesn't go a day without drinking at least 2 or 3 cups of it.  He basically want it with all of his meals.  

I thought I could out-smart him by switching his whole milk for almond milk.  I poured out the entire gallon milk and replaced it with two half gallon cartons of almond milk.  He immediately knew something was different.

I'm actually surprised that I got him to try it as many times as I did but I know for sure that he won't be drinking anymore of it.  I guess that means I'm back to the drawing board for this one.  We'll see what we can come up with for the next one.

New Diet-Week 1

Okay, so it's week 1 of Bj's special diet.  I read a lot over the past couple of days about all of the different foods that could be harmful for BJ and it sounds good to say that I'm gonna start this very elaborate diet for him, but honestly if I did that I don't think we will last a week.

I decided that we will just take it very slow with the diet.  I'm cutting dairy which is going to be very difficult in itself.  But there's going to be a twist.

BJ is 12 years old now.  If I tried to take his precious milk away I probably wouldn't hear the end of it.  Soooo, therefore I've decided that I'm going to try a milk substitute (Almond Milk) but I'm just going to pour it into his whole milk container and hopefully he won't really know the difference.

We just ran out of the remaining whole milk and I told him that we would go to the store tomorrow to get more milk.  I've saved the whole milk bottle and I'll just pour the almond milk into the gallon whole milk.

Wish us luck!! Video coming soon!

BJ's Favorite Food

When BJ was first diagnosed with Autism I ran into a lady that gave me some very valuable advice.  She told me to change his diet.  She asked me what was some of his favorite foods.  I begin listing all of the things he loved to eat.  By the time I was finished she told me that all of things that I was feeding him with a red-dye was not good for him.  He was very young at the time so it wasn't as difficult to just stop buying those things.  I immediately saw a difference.

Before I changed his diet, BJ would not even make eye contact.  He would not answer my questions. He would have tantrums and just be totally unresponsive.  When I changed his diet I saw a huge improvement.  Well, now that I'm researching again I'm learning more and more about the things that I should allow him to eat.  He's not going to like it but a change is about to happen again.

BJ's Favorite Foods:
1. pop tarts
2. milk
3. bread
4. fried chicken
5. french fries
6. pizza
7. fruit punch or red sodas

For some reason BJ was attracted to red.  He wanted red pop tarts and red juice.  I don't know if anyone else deals with this with their autistic child but my son is 12 years old and for 12 years I have been trying to get him to eat different things.  I've played all of my cards, trust me.  I've threatened, spanked, yelled, cried...you name it...I've done it.

He is stubborn.  I have to trick him a lot of times or bribe him to eat certain things.  I pick my battles, because YES it is a battle.

Our next mission is to change his diet.  I know that BJ is very capable of a lot of things.  I honestly feel like his diet is holding him back from reaching his fullest potential.  It's hard for me as well because changing his diet means that my diet has to change as well, but I'm definitely going to make a commitment to do this because he deserves a real shot at life.

BJ

I've known that my son is very different for a long time.  He was diagnosed with Autism since he was around 3 or 4.  I honestly don't remember.  I remember having a beautiful healthy baby boy.  I remember breastfeeding him.  I remember when he took his first step.  I remember making him laugh and smile.

I don't know exactly know when I noticed that he was doing a lot of different things.  One day I recognized that he wasn't speaking.  He would gesture so I knew what he wanted, but no matter how much I encouraged him, he would not speak.  

And then there was daycare.  BJ was my only child that I immediately put into daycare.  My oldest son didn't start until after he was a year old.  My youngest son has never been.  But BJ started daycare when he was a few weeks old.  I was a working single mom, at the time with two kids.  

To be honest the first few months of his life went by so quick and was really a big blur because all I did was work, clean and work some more.

He spent so much time in daycare they noticed something was wrong well before I did.  They sent home notes about his behavior stating he was very unresponsive at times and disruptive.  I didn't know what to think of this.  He responded differently, I recognized but he was never unresponsive.

They ended up referring me to a specialists and after several extensive tests with different doctors BJ was diagnosed with a "learning disability".  Honestly, Autism didn't make it into my vocabulary until years later.

I didn't know what to make of everything.  From a distance, BJ looked like a normal child.  But the closer you got the easier it was for you to spot the differences.  

Because I was so uneducated on the subject for learning disabilities and autism I did everything the doctors, teachers, counselors said.  And for the past 12 years we've lived a very passive life.

This year, however I've decided to do things differently!  BJ is now 12 and I guess as he's getting closer to adulthood I've gotten more concerned for his future.  

I've recently removed him from public schools to take charge of his education.  I'm changing his diet and looking to reach out to our local autism community.

The future is really looking brighter for our little family.  My one biggest hope is that I can get BJ to a place where he can survive and function in this world.  I look forward to connecting with other families and hopefully helping anyone by sharing our stories.

BJ's Mom!